how did he know?
i just wanted to belong
“Ugh, why did I put in my contacts and then put on my glasses? I can’t read this post at all … Okay, that’s bett-WHAT DID YOU SAY?”
Cheers, fellow sluts
Sticks and stones.
what the fuck, you sluts didn’t invite me to the party?
fuck u got me
it’s the truth guys idk what the fuck i’m reading
Men of Tumblr.. I love you.
- fandoms dont own tumblr
- hipsters dont own tumblr
- humour blogs dont own tumblr
you wanna know who owns tumblr??
THIS BETTER NOT BE THE NEW SIT NEXT TO YOUR FRIEND POST WHERE THE PUNCH LINE CHANGES EVERY TIME I SEE IT
I HAVE SEEN THREE DIFFERENT VERSIONS OF THIS POST OH MY GODS DON’T MAKE THIS THE NEW ONE
So other people aren’t seeing a bunch of twerking Misha’s?
fake!married is the best trope and i never tire of it no matter how many are written and how badly they end up being. undercover!married is even better. “we have to lull our adversary into complacency by being as MARRIED AS POSSIBLE.”
accidental, unconscious domesticity and gradual cohabiting more like SIGN ME UP. sign me up for a lifetime membership, even. put it on my damn will. bury me in a casket full of fake!married fanfic.
so tonight my philosophy professor had these nasty bruises all over her arms and she stopped mid-lecture to say “sorry you guys have to look at my bruised-up body, my friend brought a stripper pole over for thanksgiving and that shit is not easy. tip your strippers. tip your strippers well” and then immediately kept talking about philosophy